I've never been reticent about my depression; it's something I'm hardwired for -- being depressed, that is, not being not reticent. If you're a Smart, Well-Read, Somewhat Observant Person in this day and age, how can you NOT be depressed? But I digress. This isn't about explaining or defending myself. I'm prone to the demon of depression. It's a given in my world.
I felt it sneaking up on me this afternoon. It never comes all in a rush, but incrementally, slowly. Sometimes I can see it, and sometimes I can't. I had a bad case of the "I Don't Wanna's"(1) at work today, that feeling of not being able to identify anything that could help you feel better. Chocolate? No. Caffeine? No. Knitting? Cats? Bath? No, no, and no. For some unfathomable reason, this thought came to me -- "What Would Laiane Wolfsong Do?" -- and I had to smile.
Laiane has been my gaming alter ego for years now. EverQuest, EverQuest 2, Morrowind, and Oblivion, and Vanguard (when it comes out). A smart-alecky, stealthy half elven ranger who's absolutely deadly with a bow. Some people play fighters, some play mages, but I am always drawn to those that hide in the shadows and use their wits and guile (and an uber bow, d00d) as weapons.
So what would Laiane do? She would one-shot(2) that demon and have it drop in its tracks is what Laiane would do.
Laiane needs to come out and play. I'm thinking a good, long Morrowind session is in order tonight.
(1) The "I Don't Wanna's." That particular mood when you don't want to do anything at the office, i.e., I don't wanna do that filing, I don't wanna call that difficult client, I don't wanna assemble a corporate record book, u.s.w. Severe lack of motivation.
(2) One-shot. In gaming parlance, to kill an enemy/monster from a distance with a ranged weapon using one arrow/cross bow bolt/throwing knife, u.s.w., as opposed to the "root and shoot" or the "snare and scare" approaches to mob hunting.